Aadi sales

Of the month of Aadi, discount sales, Women & anything worth to be nonsense.

It is the month of Aadi. A very (in)auspicious month for women in this part of the world. Since women are the world to us (guys) minions it is therefore deemed inauspicious for us too. Gone are the decades when men were admonished for even saying the term wife in this month of the year. Hiccups there might have been, but even the ‘male’ chauvinists dreaded to enter the black hole fearing to be sucked to death by their own masculine posterity that might birth later. It took us a lot of persuasion (even from the government) to find a safer alternative for this issue 

Aadi is also infamous for the ban on anything relatively new. Brushing aside the point that it's all plain nonsense; in an orthogonal point of view it's a big money saver indeed. But how can that be even remotely plausible when the power of authority is vested on the most guile sect that had & will ever walk on the earth. When they noticed our heavy pockets & bright smile, they invented the end of season sale that transformed itself to month throughout sale becoming the worst nightmare for all present and prospective servants.  

Month before the start of activity, the board of household affairs (which will always house only one member - the wife) arranges for a ‘minutes of meeting’ with its subordinate, explaining the salient features of project and its merits. It casually drops words like “makes me hot”, “sexy”, “you are so cute” et all to keep the worker in trance. Sometimes when magic don’t seem to work, a direct list of items sneaks in when the subordinate is at its weakest-best state, just after the team did arduous work for the night.

On the arrival of the month, they head off for the business trip with great planning sans any idea. As one might expect of that paradoxical situation, they globe trot seeking for the cheapest amongst the lot only to buy stuffs at a price higher than what they used to be during normal sale. Seeing the money racked in by consumer commodities retailers other entrepreneurs are rethinking their strategy to attack the market. Interestingly there are new players too.

The foremost to jump the bandwagon is non-other than TASMAC. It has come up with a novel enticing scheme where consumers will get discount according to the percentage of alcohol available in their goods. Close behind TASMAC is another government agency – The Ration shop. They are opening up a new brand under their chain which will function only in this month. It will be named – The antique shop. It will sell all the antiqued rice that the enterprise has been stacking for eons together. An emotional Mayor who recently mazed the rice remarked that this will bring to light the long lost old flavour to the present generation. Needless to say everyone is queuing up at the entrance of The Antique shops thanks to severe marketing through televisions & print media about the price tag which even a beggar won’t bother to receive. A visibly insulted beggar association had called for a press conference and said it will henceforth receive only pizza & burger as minimum food item. Utilizing the press conference, the beggars association unveiled its own scheme for the Aadi month. It will sell all of it utensils for a mere two crore Indian rupee. Industry sources reveal that Mr.Kalmadi has already booked all those utensils for the large banquette he is planning for the opening ceremony of CWG. Not withstanding the heat of its own suns, the SUN family going to give away free Vettaikaran & Sura dvds for people who watch Deal-a No Deal-a. An interesting bait of a deal indeed.